Olaf's Chocolate Adventure!
by sanicpanic
Summary: After a night of fun parties and dancing, Olaf comes home to find Elsa craving something sweet. Olaf has just the solution for her problem! However, when word gets out about Olaf's delicious chocolate ice cream, things start to get out of hand!


Olaf had no money. He had no way of getting money because he was a useless lump of snow. Olaf wanted money and ladies. Olaf was a snowman; he needed a snow-woman to keep his company and to keep the Olaf family going strong. He hadno style he had no grace a mighty need for snow didn't want tiny snow balls, he wanted big, impressive snowballs.

Olaf cocked his sunglasses; they rested on his long, narrow carrot nose. "Ladies and gentleman, I know you are here to see your beloved movie presentation. However, I am the show."

The theatre audience gasped in shock, but they were not complaining about the snow hunk who took over their movie night. Olaf rocked out with his male chicken out all night. He even got his nose nibbled at. Olaf liked that, but he liked it even more when his favourite reindeer did it. Sven just had a way about it that made it all the more amazing.

"Well well, it's getting late. I must be on my way, my darlings." Olaf slurred, stumbling out the door. He had a little too much eggnog and sparkling apple cider. A limo cruised up to pick Olaf up and escort the snow-hunk back home.

Back at the castle, elsa was getting hungry. "I am craving something sweet, but not too sweet. I want cold food cuz im icy cold, bitch. Swag swag 420"

Olaf banged into the castle. "You're in luck, sweetie!" He slumped over on the couch. "I got somethin sweet for you, bae." He grinned.

"Olaf babes, I can never eat you!" Elsa gasped.

Olaf smiled at Elsa.

"Bro, I got your back." Olaf walked over to the corner and squatted down, screwing his face up tight. "Just gimme like two minutes, dude. I got this."

Olaf pooped in the corner.

Elsa smiled gratefully. "Thank ye olaf.!" She bent down and scooped up the chocolate ice cream. "Fuck yeah. Chocolate ice cream. MAKE IT RAIN CHOCOLATE RAIN!" said Elsa. She ate all of it happily.

Elsa told Anna, and the news spread like wildfire. Olaf's famous chocolate ice cream became popular. "Do you wanna build a snowman. It doesn't have to be a snowman.*wink wink*" said Anna to Olaf.

With more demand came greater production, Olaf produced so much ice cream that his large intestine ruptured. He kept pooping though. He kept pooping for Elsa.

"Some people are worth pooping for." said Olaf weakly

However, Olaf's ice cream became chunky. His intestines were in the ice cream, and soon his stomach was part of it. Olaf's digestive system was ruined. Now he was just a donut, and food literally ran through a tube in his body. Nobody liked the intestine ice cream.

Hans loved the intestine ice cream. He could eat it all day every day. The way the intestines slushed around in his mouth was so satisfying to him. Hans loved it so much that he kidnapped Olaf and forced him to poop 24/7 so he would never run out of intestine ice cream. Hans loved intestines so much he ripped his own out and tried to eat them, but he died so it was just kind of a stupid and embarrassing death.

Kristoff stole Olaf. He also liked the intestine ice cream but was afraid to say so because it sounded really creepy to say that he loved to eat intestines. Kristoff did not want to seem creepy. Kristoff was a poser. A big fat poser.

Olaf liked Kristoff but knew he wasn't cool enough to run with the cool crowd, so he escaped as soon as he could. Kristoff knew he would never be cool enough for anyone, so he jumped into the frozen Fjord to try to be cool one last time. "I wish that I could be like the cool kids, cuz all the cool kids, they seem to fit in." sang Kristoff.

Kristoff drowned. it was a lame death by a lame was no like the cool kids he did not seem to fit in. The duke of weselton saw olaf running around and kidnapped him. He had secretly been eating Olaf's intestine ice cream, but couldn't tell anyone because it was illegal to buy goods from Elsa's kingdom. Now, he didn't have to worry about illegally imported intestine ice cream, he had the original source right there. He made Olaf poop ice cream all the time. It was gross.

Olaf knew that the Duke of Weselton was an asshole, so he ate poison. The intestine ice cream he pooped out was poisonous, but the Duke of Weselton did not know this. The Dick of Weselton died alone, surrounded by illegal ice cream. Olaf ran away.

Olaf never did return. Nobody knows the whereabouts of Olaf to this very day. Many think that Olaf just dismantled himself and became a regular pile of snow; others think he ascended to a level of godliness

Historians believe that he became an ordained minister, and started a congregation of his own. His congregation was the Church of I.I.C, which stands for Intestine Ice Cream. this church had many followers of Olaf. They were called Olafians. This was probably because intestine ice cream was later found to be the most highly addictive substance in the world. once you ate it there was no turning back.

In light of recent discoveries, we realised that Olaf and his followers had all committed a cult suicide in an attempt to eat their own intestines. It was a stupid and embarrassing death for all of didn't even get to eat their own intestines because, you know, they were dead. Fucking were so stupid it was almost funny.


End file.
